'My cowokers... [are] gossiping about me and how I "overreacted"': Restaurant owner instructs servers to give up their tips to save his establishment

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
May 27, 2023 3:00 PM EDT

This restaurant owner broke a cardinal rule of waiting tables, and it's wild that so many of his employees actually went along with his plan. 

It's a hallmark of American life that waiters and waitresses work mainly for tips. Over the years, tip prices keep rising higher as minimum wages have stagnated, and that has started frequent debates over tipping culture. 

In a story shared to r/AmItheA**hole, this desperate restaurant owner found a way to put some more cash in his own pocket. He shared the idea in a group meeting, and surprisingly, the OP writes that the other members of the staff seemed to go along with it! The OP didn't care for that, and got angry over the owner's suggestion. The OP was concerned about acting angry, but it seems like they were caught off guard, and reacted naturally as one would to being told their hard-earned tips are going to be taken away. 

Up next, check out another funny story. 

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  • 01
    Cheezburger Image 9767653120
    via Zakaria Zayane on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - r/AmItheA Posted by u/throwaway383848219 27 days ago AITA for getting angry at my employer for suggesting I give up my tips to save the restaurant? Not the A-hole 4 Throwaway account because some coworkers know my main.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 03
    Font - I (24F) have been working at a small, family-owned restaurant as a server for the past three years. I genuinely love my job, the people I work with, and the regular customers we have. Recently, the restaurant has been struggling financially due to a combination of factors, including the ongoing pandemic and increased competition in the area.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 04
    Font - Last week, the owner, who is also the head chef, held a staff meeting. He explained that the restaurant was on the verge of going under and asked if we would be willing to donate some of our tips to help keep the business afloat. He emphasized that it would be a temporary measure and that he would work out a repayment plan for everyone once the restaurant was back on stable footing.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 05
    Font - I rely on my tips to cover my living expenses and support my younger sibling, who is still in college. I'm already struggling financially, and giving up a portion of my tips would put me in an even more precarious position. I couldn't believe that the owner would even suggest such a thing, and I got pretty upset during the meeting. I told him that it was outrageous to expect us to sacrifice our hard- earned money when we're all just trying to get by, and I stormed out.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 06
    Font - Later, I texted the owner to apologize for my outburst and offered to pick up extra shifts or help out in other ways to support the business. He replied saying that he understood my situation, but he was disappointed in my reaction. Now, I've found out that several of my coworkers have agreed to give up some of their tips, and they're gossiping about me and how I "overreacted."
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 07
    Font - I believe I might be the al because I reacted angrily in the meeting, which might have been seen as unprofessional and disrespectful towards my employer My coworkers think that I overreacted and that my anger was uncalled for. I'm worried that I might have been too harsh on my employer, who was just trying to find a solution to keep the restaurant afloat.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 08
    Font - AITA for getting angry at my employer for suggesting I give up my tips to save the restaurant, even though my coworkers are pitching in and think I overreacted? (2nd post as I don't think my first went through properly so I needed to reword the original post) I'm still pretty ped at the whole situation.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 09
    Font - BigGirthToes A Enthusiast [7] ΝΤΑ You are an employee, your job is to show up and get paid. That is not your responsibility to keep the place from going under. I'd start looking for a job somewhere else
    via u/BigGirthToes
  • 10
    Font - throwaway383848219 OP. That's what I was so angry about, I understand things are hard right now, but this is just not how to go about things.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 11
    Font - Minute Point_949. As Aficionado [15] NTA. Unless he is giving you equity in the restaurant or a promissory note, he is just engaging in wage theft.
    via u/Minute_Point_949
  • 12
    Font - throwaway383848219 OP I was thinking if it's even legal to suggest this, but I guess if it's voluntary? That makes it okay??
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 13
    Font - Time-Scene7603. A NO IT DOES NOT. Think about what tips are for. Would the guests even tip if they knew the Enthusias... restaurant was keeping the tips? No.
    via u/Time-Scene7603
  • 14
    Font - Just Me1973 Parta bant [2] NTA. You're whole income in pretty much based on your tips. The restaurant owner is the AH to ask that you sacrifice your source of income to save his livelihood. That's just selfishness on his part. You're an employee, not a partner in the business. I'd suggest finding another restaurant to work at. Everything is opening back up. I'm sure a lot of places are looking for wait staff.
    via u/Just_Me1973
  • 15
    Font - throwaway383848219 OP That's very true, it's a competitive market in my area right now, I guess I just feel attached to this place I've been at for the past 3 years.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 16
    Rectangle - Fainora Supreme Court Just-a [... NTA not only is this c its illegal C.
    via u/Fainora
  • 17
    Font - RoyallyOakie Commander in Cheeks [23... NTA...Was your boss going to jump in and cover your living expenses if you had problems? Likely not. If he needs your tips to get by, he's not going to make it. Time to get out of there.
    via u/RoyallyOakie
  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 9767672320
    via u/
  • 19
    Font - We live off our tips because our paychecks are nothing. So how does this owner expect his employees to pay their bills? Get second jobs or what? I'm honestly ped of for you over this entire situation.
    via u/deleted
  • 20
    Font - throwaway383848219 OP Right?!? And the problem is he is a genuinely nice and sweet guy, everyone in the room was giving me the stink eye because I had a problem with it.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 21
    Font - redlegphi Parta ipant [2] NTA. If your tips would make the difference in the restaurant staying afloat, it's definitely going under and your coworkers are never going to get paid back. This is a risk business owners take. It's unethical of them to try to shift that risk to their labor.
    via u/redlegphi
  • 22
    Font - One_Ad_704 THIS! And then where will they be? Out their tips with no chance of getting any money.
    via u/One_Ad_704
  • 23
    Font - Time-Scene7603. A Enthusiast [7] It is not legal in any state in the US under any. circumstances for an employer to keep tips.
    via u/Time-Scene7603
  • 24
    Font - TemptingPenguin369. Pooperintendant [65] NTA. One, not sure where you are but there's a good chance this is illegal. Two, if a business is doing so poorly that it can only survive with unpaid workers, this is a business that is sinking.
    via u/TemptingPenguin369
  • 25
    Font - throwaway383848219 ОР He did say it would be temporary but still I agree, even if it was a small amount of my tips I need that to cover all of my own expenses.
    via u/throwaway383848219
  • 26
    Font - Annual-Intern5669. Also, it's literal tips- it never ever was the business' money in the first place. This is no different from them demanding you cut them a personal check
    via u/Annual-Intern5669

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tips servers tipping restaurant Horrible Bosses dining aita waiter
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